I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
my mom just texted me to let me know that Hooters is hiring
i wish my mom had big dreams like that for me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
I'm just saying, I walked in on you blowing a burrito. I now understand how obsessed you are with Taco Bell. And how long it's been since you've got some.
Can I borrow your google glasses to make a sex tape?
I just fixed my mom's tv over the phone in 2.17 minutes while high. I'm a fucking professional.
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
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