Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up to my dog trying to clean my vagina.
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
Is her dick bigger than yours?
You are the best. Or certainly adequate for tempering my unholy desires.
That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me.
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize