I have way too many pictures of poop on my phone
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
I guess she found the pillow case full of vomit I hid last night: "Oh my God. Oh my God. In my fucking FRIDGE?! Really? Hope your dick falls off there's puke all over my food. Fucking die."
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