no you cant smoke seaweed
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
I'm still not a hundred percent.. I haven't shit anything solid in two days.. I have pulled my puker muscles and I can't take deep breaths cuz of other unidentified muscles/maybe heart attack
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
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Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
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I don't want my vagina anymore.
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
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