ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hypothetically speaking how does one remove a lamp that they hypothetically superglued to the ceiling?
Acetone nail polish remover, and you lied about studying last night didn't you?
Oh definitely.
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
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