i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
Why do I feel like that's not the first time you've drank champagne with someone dressed as a unicorn?
I need to move out. I just walk of shamed my way into a family breakfast party. There's no response when grandma says "where you coming from in heels at 9AM?"
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
I need a rain check on breakfast. A frat boy said it was his dream to sleep with a MILF, I made his dream come true and he made me cum
There is no way I’m wasting 21 year old morning wood
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