ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
Ok...drunk girls at the bar are charging $1 for motorboating. It's fucking WEDNESDAY. I never want to leave.
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OMG the post office opened my dildo! "we sincerely regret the damage to your package"
I picked the lock on the bathroom door and sang him a song while he pooped. Why is he mad?
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
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