i'm pretty sure the devil's penis is california-shaped
4 words: hood of his car
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
Randomize