They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
are you just going to ignore any texts involving my penis from now on? because thats going to shut down a pretty sizeable portion of our conversations.
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
Randomize