I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
In a shocking revelation, I learned that the Easter Sunday shit show happened not because of vodka but because my gay neighbor drugged me.
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He put chocks of wood in front of his doors to stop me from leaving. I'm not nearly drunk enough for that to be appropriate behaviour.
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
Getting food poisoning after eating at work was the cherry on top of my "Welcome back to real life" sundae.
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
Randomize