i just broke my key off in the door of my house because the engine wasnt starting
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
Randomize