the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
I'm playing wingman, but I want to pull a Goose and die.
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
My mother is currently smoking weed with a dying bee so his last moments aren't miserable. And she wonders why I rescued a grasshopper missing a leg.
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
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