but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
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What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
Also, you tried to make me learn all of the presidents, in order, with a picture book as an aid. At 4 am. What the fuck?
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
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I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
Its like drunk me is Oprah except instead of a car everyone's award is seeing my boobs
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
You don't make any sense
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