Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
I will come to your office dressed as a bloody mary, hug you then leave is that a good plan?
yes. bring a barf bucket too. just. in. case.
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
If I don't quit picking up guys when I'm drunk, I'm going to need a vagina transplant.
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
Never remove your contact lenses after eating an entire bag of spicy doritos.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize