I love you
are you drunk
yes but I def love you, we should get married
But I'm Jewish
embrace Jesus
I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
We were literally making dick jokes with his dick out
That’s the level of friends with benefits I aspire to achieve
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
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