Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
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