She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
They left me at home... I'm a liability
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