I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
there's a guy on campus handing out business cards. you pay him to see if your girlfriend will cheat. the company name is "tying up loose ends"
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
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