hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
I love having hate sex.
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
Tonight I learned to never try to impress your ex by dancing on the stripper pole while drunk. That’s how you end up in the ER
Randomize