Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
Also I can show up hungover, fall asleep at my desk, and smell like a bottle of whiskey, and they still like me more then my shitty co worker
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
My mom is worried I'm not eating enough protein so she's sending me 48 cans of tuna. That's not a typo.
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