hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you bring me a slurpee and advil I will eat you out for like an hour.
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
Please come over here so I can show off my beard, talk to you about how quantum computing is actually a symptom of interstellar physics, and then put my head under your dress
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
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