two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
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