Swine flu. Run for my life!
I created a new tequila drink. it is a mix of excitement and fear instilled in innocent people.
dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"
you were almost asleep and mumbling "your penis is on my cheek"
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
I'm lonelier than Tom Hanks in Cast Away, right meow. Ready to make this bong my Wilson.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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