Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
Then, halfway through our conversation, I remembered what you drunkenly told me last night and was all "maintain eye contact, do not look at his massive penis".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
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