Memo to self- delete texts about butt sex from you before giving my mom my old phone to use.
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
operation harelip BJ is a go
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
Imagine how different my life would be if I could find a man who gave me more pleasure than pizza at 2am when I'm drunk.
I was so drunk I asked my mom if she had always been my mom or if it was someone else for a while
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