My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
I never thought I'd have to apologize for tasting like absinthe and cheetos before tonight
You’re sleeping on my couch so you’re not making dick appointments tonight
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