I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
If we don't have crazy animal sex tonight at least twice, I'll know he's cheating on me.
Who wouldn't want crazy animal sex with you?!
A cheater.
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
Randomize