do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
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I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
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