you traded sex for a burrito?
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Asking the cop for directions wearing a lion mask may not have been my best moment...
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
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