I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
I'm going to need you to stop harassing my professor on Twitter when you're drunk.
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
Randomize