I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
I'm at derby!
The kentucky derby! But its night time, theres no way the horses are awake at this time.
we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
I've started drunk signing up for 5ks. Who even does that?
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
Randomize