I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
Randomize
