so he was shitfaced and kept using sticky notes to label everything like "beer spill" and "going to fuck later"
i made sure i dropped the whole "im a yoga teacher" bomb which basically roofies a guys sense of judgement and guarantees he will sleep with me.
Nothing like all your friends getting engaged to remind you how much fun sleeping around is.
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
I'm at the store buying a new phone cause I pissed all over mine last night. Drunk me is expensive as shit.
Randomize