dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
Power went out. She lit a candle and gave me head. Made some pretty impressive candlelight cocksucking shadowpuppets. Must be what porn was like in olden times.
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
THEY LEFT ME IN A CLUB BY MYSELF. I’M SO ANNOYED. I’M GOING TO FUCK THEIR BARTENDER FRIEND. Caps only because I’m really mad.
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