Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
He gave me one look and told me I'm not allowed to board the plane if I'm still as drunk by departure time.
It's hard to judge what a reasonable amount of cereal looks like in the spaghetti pot. We're out of cap'n crunch and milk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
The whole time we were hanging out my vagina was yelling at me like its a real live penis that wants to have sex with us what are you doing
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
I can’t believe you’re letting her use the Mercedes
It seemed like a better idea while she was giving me a hand job. It’s a good thing we weren’t having sex. Who knows what I would agree to during sex
Just remember I’m your roommate with extremely questionable morals
Exactly, what could possibly go wrong
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