Omg my grandpa just told me he wants to die in his 90's shot by a jealous husband
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
My sister was not impressed when she got here. I was standing in the doorway in my underwear drinking a beer. At 2pm. On a Monday.
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
Apparently i tried to feed this guy's piranhas my whole left arm.. according to him, i was "showing them whos boss, bc if they try to eat my arm, im guna punch their face"
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
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