Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
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plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The sad part is I didn't even want to get laid. I just wanted the emotional connection, but my vagina was screaming "TOUCH ME. TOUCH ME RIGHT NOW BECAUSE MY DADDY ISSUES ARE MUCH DEEPER THAN MY EMOTIONAL NEEDS!" Vodka has a way of getting me out of my emotions and gets me fucked every time.
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
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