Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
if i get killed by an online date, its your job to tell my parents that we met at church
i just renamed my vag "the sorting hat"
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
She turned off her phone alarm (which was the theme song to Star Wars) and then asked me if I wanted a blow job before she went...of course I am going to see her again.
Randomize