is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
You drunk-dialed me and asked me to describe my burrito
They don't have a Valentines Day card for the married guy I'm sleeping with. It can't use the words, love, soulmate, you're the only one for me...and obviously it can't be anything related to spending the day together because that's not happening.
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
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