I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
I would explain the ketchup stains in the bed to him but saying I just got my period is so much less embarrassing...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just met me in 10 years...this lady keeps an emergency wine cooler in her bag
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
Ran into my statistics professor at the bar, he chugged a car bomb and yelled "x bar mothfucker!". On average I'm loving this PhD program.
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
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