I just tipped a bartender in xanax.
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
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