never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like Facebook knows when I'm about to masturbate and tells me to reconnect with exes.
I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
Maid of honor screwed up the joke so I just got to explain what a strap on is and why a married lady might want one to Grandma and my brother's wedding shower.
I yelled at your uterus for you.
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