she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
splinters make it hard to masturbate
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize