Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
Found my smoke alarm in a ziploc in my toilet...again
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
Turns out lunch break sex with someone you cant stand being around for any amount of time just makes you wish you had gone to get tacos like you originally planed.
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
My FitBit tracked the calories I burned during sex. Hello 2015!
I nicked my vulva while shaving and I'm about to go on a date where I will be having sex. Which bandaid: My Little Pony or princesses?
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
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