Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
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