Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My girlfriend is studying for the MCAT by watching The Magic Schoolbus. There go my dreams of being a househusband.
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
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