She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
I have an explanation for how we got this drunk this fast... but you wont like it. We are officially in complete liver failure.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
One minute we were playing beer pong, and the next minute I was sprinting to my apartment with a watermelon. wtf happened in between?
It's no shave November. This is our time.
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
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