I wanna passion pit in your ass
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Only my sister would update her facebook status while going into labor.
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
Next time I think it’s a good idea to hook up with any of your wife’s family members or friends just kick me in my dick
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