She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
The hospital said it would be 'irresponsible' for them to allow people to book stomach pumps.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
Was asked out on a date tonight on Linked In. That creepy genius at apple that touched my butt one time in the back stairwell. I thinks it's fair to say I've hit rock bottom.
Ok fine, yes she's pregnant. But you're ignoring the most important part. HER BOOBS GOT BIGGER. That doesn't happen every day, and I owe it to myself to enjoy those boobs before the belly catches up to them!
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize