just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
I went outside for a smoke at 4 and things seemed normal. It's 6 now and the front lawn is COVERED in tortilla chips. WTF?
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
Randomize